“I Can't Sing?!”
Hello, Angel Voice Followers,
Did you say “I can’t Sing?”...
What a great thing to tell yourself… “I can't sing!” … Of course I am joking.
I get this response 90% of the time when I ask, “Come and join my choir”. This is the strangest response to hear, “I can't sing.” It’s like I should say, “ok that’s that then!” The thing is as odd as that sounds to me, I do understand that sentiment. However, I know that this is simply not true.
Those who know me, know the story of how I lost my voice, and for 2 years I cried about it and then spent a further 3 years not only repairing my ability to sing, but surpassing my own expectations. There are a lot of books and stories I have read about other singers, coaches and business mentors that talk about reasons for everything that happens in your life. I genuinely believe that I lost my voice so that it would give me the motivation to help others who believe that they can't sing.
Here in Powys, every person I have heard makes me believe that singing is beautiful. There are so many talented people in this part of the world who just don't know that they are talented. They have been undermined in one way or another and talked out of singing, until they believe it was their idea. I would like to say this shocks me, but it doesn’t anymore. Some of the horror stories I have been told make me so upset, because my experience was not much different. However what truly shocks me more is the belief that not everyone can sing and that singing isn't really that important. I believe my purpose in life is to let everyone know they can sing, they deserve to sing and they deserve to do it loud and with pride. I love hearing effort!
So yes…. Everyone can sing!
The importance of Singing in your own life…
Singing is more to do with self care and self belief and confidence than it is to do with hearing. It is also a great way to learn how to let go. I have taught many students over the years to know that their voice once they love it will set them free… If you can sing, you have confidence, but if you can't sing, there is no confidence. I know I make this sound so easy, but let me tell you I do appreciate the effort you have to go to to make yourself heard, and that is by just you, let alone others.
Some people believe they can't sing because they have to work hard at learning to pitch. And then other people who can sing and can pitch easily are afraid of rejection. When you sing in a group, all this melts away with time. Time is one of the keys, just like it is with anything else to do with self improvement.
There are many factors as to why someone can't pitch, and I will go into those in another blog, but not today. My point in writing this is to let you know that you can sing. Everyone can sing, and there isn't a vocal coach out there worth their salt if they don't tell you that not everyone can sing. With effort and drive and commitment and skill learned by listening to your coach, you can do it. I have seen students of mine change their jobs to higher paid jobs because they learned to love their voice. I have seen them stand on a stage after years of being afraid to speak to just one person and sing in front of hundreds of people. This is no accident, this is what singing does for you.
Seeing and Feeling Live Singing in Action…
This last weekend, myself and a handful of my students went out to raise the vibrational level of business at a local spring market at Newtown Business Hub. It was a great pleasure to do, and it does make people happier when they hear music. It raises that vibration. They become more engaged with each other, not with just us, but with everybody in the room.
Music is everything when it comes to being a part of a community, and yes it does help us to be happier and stops the energy from becoming flat. In fact, the way I feel about being in a room full of music where you're buying gifts and food, is that it creates a more 5-dimensional feeling. And also, it creates a moment that will not be forgotten. So many people shared their thanks with us.
My students, off their own back, went out and promoted the school workshops. To anybody and everybody that was there, these were all students who were children and adults who at one time had told me that they didn't have confidence to speak to strangers. Amazing to watch them share their joy of singing with strangers, my heart felt full, because I know this joy already.
One of the things that I've always come up against is the one thing that they came up against. And that was,
“Oh, don't ask me, I can't sing.” Then they turned to a faithful friend and affirmed through them.
“Can I?” To which their friend goes,
“Oh, no, they're terrible!. They are terrible singers!.” Which always makes me laugh. When my students came up against this comment, they all said, I was the same, but then…. and gave their story, I was touched by it all.
Oh, how much they want to believe this to be true I can see it in their faces. The truth is, it’s a defence mechanism that stops them trying to sing, for so many possible reasons…
Rejection? Ridicule? Laughter?
There is also the genuine reason of not liking singing, which if I am honest I do not understand, so I won’t even try to. Essentially I know from my experience that when you ask someone to sing it does not really bring a positive image in their minds. And I see it all the time, it is the reason why I've spent the last 8 years dedicating myself to showing people that if they sing and sing with joy, with love, and most importantly, with happiness, the world is their oyster, for want of a better phrase. And I give them an image that is totally different from the one that they have in their mind.
Sharing the Good Vocal Vibes…
What was amazing last Sunday was my students' faces, their body language and their excitement in telling their story of how they found their voice. I felt that now, I wasn't alone in telling this story. This time I had my wonderful students who have experienced through the last 8 years the effects of what singing does for them. It's not about being famous. And I say this all the time.
What I witnessed with my students. And I am paraphrasing here. Is their response that they gave to the sentence, I can't sing.
“I thought that too. But I just came to one session and now I have something in my life that I love, and it lifts me. And I am a part of a beautiful community that supports my life.” Twice I heard words to this effect from two different students. And even one from a mother of a student, and it just lifted me. It means that the last 8 years I am on the right track. It means that I am getting through just a little bit as to how important singing is in everyone's life, whether they listen to it or become a part of it. But becoming a part of it is second to none.
So the word is spreading.
And yes, YES, you can sing and you can sing with all your heart and no one. And I mean no one has the right to tell you that you can't.
So don't tell yourself that you can't either.
Have a most blessed day.
Forever your singing coach,
Cathy.